The Breakfast Room

Mom's breakfast room was one of my favorite rooms in her house.  I liked the look of the room, but the reason it was one of my favorite rooms is because what happened in the breakfast room.

Breakfast, of course, happened in the breakfast room (often accompanied by burnt toast!).  Breakfast for me is usually just coffee.  Black coffee.  And lots of it.  The best part of the day is having the time to sit in the breakfast room and drink this massive amount of coffee in a relaxed manner.  It is also best shared with someone else.  Mom and I spent many hours in her breakfast room drinking coffee.  Whenever I came back to Florida after a Shelby visit, Mom always called me to tell me the thing she missed most was waking up to coffee and me sitting at the breakfast room table.  We often said we solved a lot of the world's problems during that time!  We talked about everything.  Those moments will always remain some of my fondest memories with Mom.  I think she feels the same way.

One Valentine's Day I sent her a pink coffee mug.  I knew it would be symbolic of these morning spent with her.  I was always amazed at how the morning would creep close to noon!  I am an early riser, so this means a lot of time was spent drinking coffee.  I was always relaxed on my visits to Shelby.  It was special.

Of course, breakfast isn't the only meal we ate at that oak table.  We ate most of our meals there unless there were too many people to fit around the table.  It was usually big enough once we added the two leaves.  Whenever Jim and my kids were able to come to Shelby, we often had delicious meals at Mom's house in that breakfast room.  The Yeltons usually joined us and we would have some wonderful conversations and laughs. 

Mom and Gene loved to play gin.  They played gin almost every afternoon at that breakfast room table.  Mom said that whenever Gene came over he rarely made it past that room!  I think she let him go down the hall to the den whenever there was a ballgame on tv.  Seriously, I think those games of gin were a blessing to both Gene and Mom.  They had a lot of good conversations and some laughs every day when they played.  They also had some serious betting going on!  Mom said she usually lost one to two dollars to Gene each time.  I think he must have had the upper hand....or he often had the luck of the draw!  I know that since Mom moved to Florida, probably the thing she misses most is those afternoon gin games with Gene.  I know he is lonely without her, but he does play gin frequently with his brother, Bill. 

There is a plaque on Mom's breakfast room wall that says:  'Be kind to your kids.  They choose your nursing home.'  Stratford Court is far from a nursing home, but Mom totally and completely trusted Jim and me to find it and choose it for her.  It was a bit stressful, but I think I can rest easy now.  Mom loves it there and we all know it was the best thing for her to do.  I give Jim a lot of credit for doing the research and for finding Stratford.  Mom loves it that her son-in-law actually did this for her and that he actually wanted her here.  None of those mother-in-law jokes come out of Jim's mouth!  He really loves Mom and does not find her to be a burden in any way.  I know this to be true because he keeps her stocked with Snickers Bars and Baby Ruths!

Mom went to the local art gallery, Buffalo Creek, and bought an odd statue.  I know Martha thought she was a bit off her rocker!  It is unusual and not quite Mom's usual taste.  It is basically a wood trunk with a skinny neck and a flat head.  It is supposed to be a man, and I can see the artistic interpretation in the piece.  I think Mom bought it with my son, Joseph, in mind.  Joseph is an artist and a musician and because of that, he has been stereotyped into one who likes 'weird' stuff!  I guess he doesn't mind.  When Grandma moved, I made sure Joseph took this piece.  I knew he would truly appreciate it.

Mom's breakfast room table was used for meals and for playing cards.  It was also used for letter writing, bill paying, newspaper reading and wordsearch puzzles.  Mom used to complain about being worried about 'losing it,' as she calls it.  I told her she had to exercise her brain as much as possible.  One way I decided was to have her work on wordsearch puzzles.  All throughout school, as a student and a teacher, I used wordsearch puzzles.  They were a great tool to help students use their brains and logic and to search for spelling words or vocabulary words.  I started making wordsearch puzzles on my computer and mailing them to Mom to work on.  She really got into them.  I tried to theme each one and personalize them so that they were more fun and meaningful.  One Christmas I found a giant wordsearch puzzle book and gave it to Mom.  I knew she would always have it and would not have to wait around for me to create new puzzles and mail them to her.

Now that Mom is at Stratford Court, she keeps that wordsearch book next to her chair in her little den.  She says that she is never bored as long as she has something to read or that puzzle book to work on!

Mom's breakfast room was decorated with all sorts of things.  The serving counter had Joe's artwork entitled Arizona Sunset hanging above it.  He gave that to his grandma one Christmas knowing she loved to display things that her grandchildren made and also knowing the breakfast room was a perfect spot for it.  It is a great piece and after Mom moved, I made sure that piece came with me.  It now hangs in my little hallway where I have a lot of Joe's artwork displayed.

Porter is another creative grandchild.  He made a collage for Grandma one Christmas.  He put pictures on it and used each letter of Grandma to start a sentence about her.  It is really sweet and special and it had a prominent place on the wall in her breakfast room.  It now hangs in her bedroom at Stratford Court and she sees it, along with Porter's picture, every morning when she wakes up.

We often tease Mom about having so many pictures of Madeline around, but then, so do I.  Madeline has always liked to have her picture made, unlike my boys.  Also as a dancer and performer, there have been many photo shoots and opportunities for pictures.  It's hard not to have an abundance of these pictures on display.  Mom's breakfast room had a little collection of Madeline photos in the corner of her counter.  I think the boys understand why there are so many pictures of Madeline around.  I hope they don't feel slighted!  Tim, Madeline's future father-in-law, got a 'tour' of Mom's apartment one night after we had dinner at Stratford Court with her.  He saw the collection of pictures of Madeline (and Eric) on her refrigerator and he leaned over and whispered in my ear, "looks like Madeline is the favorite!"  Of course we laughed and I knew he didn't mean it, but I have since gotten a collection of pictures of all the other grandkids to put on Mom's refrigerator to even things out a little!  

Mom had a  blue antique bowl on the center of her breakfast room table.  She brought it to Florida with her and it is in her den.  It has always been a piece that brings a smile to us.  We call it her Buick. 

When Jim and I were young married 'kids' without a lot of money, we needed another car.  Sharing a car was getting kind of old.  Gus Gregory is a dear family friend and he had an old Buick 225 that he was trading in for a new car.  When he learned that we needed a car, he sold us his Buick for $225.00.  He was just a kind man doing a huge favor for two struggling newlyweds.  It was a bargain.  Jim loves to brag that we drove that car for a year and then sold it ourselves for $325.00!  It was probably one of the best car deals we ever made. 

One night we were visiting Mom and Dad and having dinner at the breakfast room table.  We commented on the pretty blue bowl, and somehow in the conversation we learned that Mom paid $250.00 for the bowl.  It was extravagant, but she said it just happened in a weak moment!  Jim was totally amazed and he said astonishingly, "that is more than I paid for my Buick!"  Thus, the Buick bowl.  We call it that to this day.

Mom has some interesting things in her breakfast room that people gave her for gifts.  Mom really is a good cook, but she likes to claim she isn't.  I guess as she has gotten older, she has truly gotten away from cooking a lot, so the jokes about her cooking have continued.  (The burnt toast is not a joke, however.  Just ask anyone who has been over to Mom's for breakfast!)  Someone gave her a cute porcelain plaque that says:  'Many people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead normal, healthy lives.'  Mom wasn't insulted.  She proudly displayed this plaque right on her cabinet!

Another friend gave her a beautiful mosaic stepping stone inscribed with the 23rd Psalm.  It is also proudly displayed in her breakfast room.  It is a wonderful reminder to all of us that the Lord truly is our shepherd.

 Mom had some Russian drinking vessels on the wall in her breakfast room.  We moved those to Florida and hung them in her kitchen above the tea cart that we also moved from her breakfast room.  It made that little kitchen look special!   Mom and Dad purchased these drinking vessels in New York at Yale R. Burge.  They are unique 18th century vessels.  These same vessels can be seen in "Fiddler on the Roof," which is always special to me because I know that was Daddy's favorite musical.  He loved it!  I cannot hear "If I Were a Rich Man" or "Sunrise Sunset" without thinking of Daddy.

Another unusual thing Mom had in her breakfast room were sconces on the wall.  They are made out of real spindles from a loom.  They are significant because Shelby really became a mill town after 1920 and the cotton industry was important to its growth and success.  We left those sconces on the wall when Mom moved, but when I was there just last month I saw them and decided to ship them to Florida to my home.  I now have them hanging in my breakfast room above the old wooden table crumber that Mom also had hanging in her breakfast room.  So many memories.



Mom had a couple more things in her breakfast room that hold significance for me.  One is a beautiful needlepoint pillow on the captain's bench under the window.  This pillow is of two kittens and I love it!  When I asked Mom if someone made it for her she told me no that she bought it because I liked cats and it matched the sofa.  Sounds like good reasons to me.  Mom isn't much of a pet lover, so I felt like she really did have me in mind when she bought the pillow.

Probably one of the most interesting things Mom had in her breakfast room is an antique high chair.  She did move it to Florida and has it in her dining room.  It has always been a conversation piece.  She bought this high chair when I was pregnant with Joseph.  She actually used that high chair for all 3 of my children and for Porter whenever any of the grandchildren visited.  I can't believe an antique high chair survived all of that!  It was not the most comfortable or practical high chair, but it will always be special.  I have dibs on it if I ever have a grandchild.  But I guess I can let Mom enjoy it for her great-grandchildren for a while!

I suppose that the breakfast room in my house is used about as much as any room in the house.  Jim likes to use it for his 'desk.'  He claims the internet connection is better there than back in our bedroom where his real desk is.  I think it just feels more homey and keeps him closer to the actions of home.  Plus, if you strain your neck you can see the tv from the breakfast room table!  I often use the table for my craft projects, so I can't say much.

My friends and I play bridge at my breakfast room table and my family and our guests eat most of our meals there.  Sometimes we eat on the lanai or in the dining room for special occasions and sometimes we eat in our easy chairs in front of the tv!  That is a perk for being empty-nesters and having raised 3 kids who ate 3 meals a day at the table.

Many Christmas cards have been addressed at my breakfast room table and games have been played on my iPad at that table.  We play cards, Yahtzee, Apples to Apples and a myriad of other games at the breakfast room table.  We sit there to drink our morning coffee and read the newspaper.  I do the crossword puzzles out of the paper at that table.  Jim and I enjoy morning conversation sitting at the table before our busy days start.  It's nice to sit in the breakfast room and look out onto the lanai and see the pool which always looks so inviting.  I have sat alone at my breakfast room table and said my prayers of thanksgiving, and I have sat there and cried over my losses and my sorrows.

I looked up a definition of breakfast room.  The American Heritage Dictionary entry reads like this:  'Breakfast Room.  n.  A room, as in a house or hotel, in which meals are eaten.'

This definition only skims the surface.  A breakfast room can be a central meeting place for families.  It can be a significant place for conversation.   I cannot count the number of conversations have taken place around Mom's breakfast room table or my own.

I say pour another cup of coffee and let's talk and let's play.

And memories are made of this.

What Happened to November?

Today is December 1, 2012.  My question is this:  what happened to November?  I have always heard that time flies and that the older you get the faster it seems to go.  I have never felt that way so much as I have the last few months!
November was a packed month for us.  Looking back on my calendar for November, there is hardly a blank space.  It started with a day of bridge....what a great way to start the month!  I was host for our Marathon Bridge match.  I always enjoy a day of bridge at the table with the 3 Marys and Anita!  Afterwards, I served lunch and no sooner than I had recuperated from that, it was time to go to my friend's house for a night of bridge!  I am in a couple of bridge groups that meet regularly and this was our regular night to meet.  One can never have too much bridge or the friendly fellowship that accompanies it.  It so happens, the very next morning my other bridge group met!  I (almost) had my fill of bridge, and I enjoyed every moment of it.

November was also a month for arts and crafts festivals.  I love going to them.  There is so much imagination and talent out there in the world.  It just makes my heart soar!  Of course, I am always looking for ideas for my own crafting, but I also bought several things for gifts.  I bought a pottery butter dish for to take to Carol in Shelby.  Little did I know she has a "thing" for butter dishes!
I am always in favor of supporting artists.  My friend, Anita, and I actually wore ourselves completely out one Saturday after attending the Arts and Crafts Festival at my church and then making our way to Dunedin for their annual Art Harvest.  It was huge!  We had such a wonderful time.  Susan Gott was the featured artist at Art Harvest.  She works in several mediums, particularly glass.  Her work is exquisite.  She designed this harvest moon glass sculpture specifically for Art Harvest.  This design was used on the tee shirts sold for Art Harvest.  As Anita was buying some of Susan Gott's artwork,  I met her and she mentioned the tee shirts and told me to go buy one so she could sign it for me.  So of course I did.  I am a sucker for long sleeve tee shirts and I don't think I own one that is signed by the artist herself.

This November was also a time for our country to elect our new president.  Although I am not sure everyone in our family agreed on who to vote for, I am happy that everyone chose to exercise their right to vote and we all went to the polls.  Our votes were cast and our voices heard.  It made watching the election results that evening much more exciting and meaningful.  It feels good to know that you participated in this huge and important event.

November seemed to be a month for appointments....for both Mom and myself.  We had to keep a close watch on our calendars to see who needed to be where and when!  It always feels good to get those appointments completed and marked off the to-do list.  And it feels especially good when the results from the doctors and dentists are all healthy and positive.  

I went back to Shelby in November (although I had just been there the month before) to see Porter's performance in his school production of 'Blithe Spirit'.  He played Charles Condomine in Noel Coward's comic play from 1941.  This is a demanding role and Porter found himself on stage almost entirely throughout the production.  He had to learn a multitude of lines and he spent a lot of time working on the play (as he was also the stage manager). The hard work certainly paid off.  I thought he was fabulous!  Having done some community theater myself, I know first hand what goes into a production like this.  Not only were these young people dedicated to putting on a first-class performance, they all managed to continue to keep up their schoolwork.....AND their good spirits!  I am glad I was able to see Porter perform.

As I watched Porter on stage, I had all sorts of thoughts, feelings and emotions.  I guess the worst of them being that I was so sorry his mother was not there. She would have been so proud.  But the best part of that is knowing that so much of Porter's determination and work ethic are attributed to her wonderful mothering.  

I also saw my own children up on that stage in Porter.  I had never realized how much he looked like my kids until that night.  Family genes are truly amazing.  Porter definitely has some of those Porter genes!  

I remember one time when Mom came to Florida to see Madeline's dance recital and she kept saying afterwards that she saw Jimmy on that stage.  It was the first time she had seen such a family resemblance between those two siblings.  Of course, it helped that Madeline was dressed as a boy in that particular performance!  I do know what Mom means....now more than ever.

While I was in Shelby seeing Porter's play, I stayed with my friend, Carol.  Her hospitality was wonderful!  I slept later each morning than normal because she created such a comfortable room for me to sleep in.  She drove me around, lended a listening ear, and fed me livermush and cheese grits....what could be better than that?!  

One day Carol, Sally, Beth and I went into Carol's basement and spent hours working on a fun craft project.  Carol made chili for us and had a fire going in the fireplace.  We listened to Christmas music as well as some good old 70's tunes and we laughed and talked a lot as we worked.  Carol also made homemade vanilla ice cream and blueberry cobbler.  It was truly a wonderfully perfect afternoon and evening.

Thanksgiving was a little earlier than usual this year.  I had a lot to do to get ready for our Thanksgiving week.  Bob and Porter came from Shelby.  Madeline and Mom are living here this year.  What a blessing that is!  No more airline tickets and airport pickups to coordinate.  Jimmy lives here in Clearwater, so it was nice having almost everyone.  We missed Joseph and Ashley, but they just couldn't make it down.  They are coming for Christmas, so we really look forward to that!

Thanksgiving week begins with lots and lots of grocery shopping, cleaning, and organizing.  This year I organized the first annual Turkey Olympics.  We had Team Bob and Team Jim.  In hindsight, the teams were not exactly even, but Bob is a true sportsman and graciously conceded.  Team Jim won on most accounts, in particular the Corn Hole Tournament.  Mom was such a good sport and decided to try to play.  You should have seen her face when she got one of the beanbags in the hole!  It was priceless.  I love that she was willing to try and join in on the games.  Madeline made a giant chart to tally all the points for each of the different events.  I can't believe I won the coloring contest this year....I had some stiff competition.  Porter and Madeline take their coloring seriously.  Mom improved her guessing skills significantly over last year.  She won the guess for the number of peanuts in the jar.  She was (rightfully) proud of herself.

Madeline won the guess for the mini marshmallows in a jar.  Amazingly, she was actually only 4 marshmallows off.  I don't know how she managed to guess so closely.

The best part of Madeline's big win was what she chose to do with her prize of this jar of mini marshmallows.  I cannot remember ever laughing as hard as I did when I walked out on the lanai Thanksgiving night and saw Madeline sitting at the table with a small tea light candle, toothpicks and mini marshmallows.  She was diligently roasting these mini marshmallows on toothpicks over the tea light bonfire!  It was a sight to behold!  Of course, Porter and I jumped right on the bandwagon and joined her.  These little marshmallows taste really good when you burn them and eat them off the toothpick.  It was about as close to a campfire as we get here in Florida!

Thanksgiving morning started bright and early with us all trekking to Clearwater High School to participate in the annual Turkey Trot.  It is a tiring walk for me, but it really sets the tone for the day.  I loved walking with my family and the Barnes family.  It was chillier than it has been in years past, so it felt a bit more like Thanksgiving.  Porter, Eric, Adam and Tim were happy for a little reprieve in the weather as they always run the 5K.  The rest of us enjoy it at a slower pace.

We celebrated the holiday with our usual feast.  Porter made the macaroni and cheese casserole again, and it was a group favorite, as always.  Porter also peeled carrots for me.  He said it was his first time ever peeling carrots and he agreed that it is sort of fun to use that handy little vegetable peeler!  Madeline has perfected the stuffing so now that has become her annual job.  

My pound cake fell for the first time ever and I made the wrong caramel frosting recipe, but Porter forgave me and ate it anyway.  The pumpkin pies spilled in the oven and the 22 pound turkey was a bit dry, but I still think it was one of our best Thanksgivings ever!

 

At our Thanksgiving dinner table, we had English crackers at our places.  It was fun to crack them open and read the riddles and find the prizes.  I loved seeing everyone around the Thanksgiving table with their paper crowns on their heads!  In the spirit of the Turkey Olympics, we decided to award a prize to the person who kept their crown on the longest.  My crown stayed on throughout dinner and clean up. Bob watched football with his crown resting proudly on his head.  Finally Bob and I called a truce and decided we both won....thus a point for Team Bob and a point for Team Jim.  These crackers were a little added bonus of fun.  

Also at the table, I gave out copies of this blog that I had printed and made into a nice bound book.  I think everyone appreciated them and I hope they enjoy re-reading the posts from time to time.  It is a bit of family history and is certainly full of many memories.  I hope next Thanksgiving I can give them yet another blog book full of even more wonderful memories!  We are on our way towards creating those memories and every day we are living our family's history.

The night before Thanksgiving was a treat for us as well.  Mom had 10 of us in a private dining room at Stratford Court for dinner.  Not only was the meal fun and delicious, it meant a night out of the kitchen for me!  Stratford Court cut no corners.  We had shrimp cocktail, filet mignon, asparagus, salad, rolls, baked potatoes and Boston Cream Pie.  This was a good kick start for our stomachs to prepare for the feast ahead!  Thanks, Mom, for arranging this truly fun evening.

Jim's brother and sister-in-law came the day after Thanksgiving.  Bob, Tommy and Jim got to play a great golf course together and do some male bonding.  I'm sure a day on the links was a welcomed change to being inside watching football and eating massive amounts of food.

And of course, the Yelton's visit would not be complete without a visit to Sungroves for ice cream......FOUR TIMES!

The month rounded out with taking down the Fall decorations and putting up the Christmas decorations.  I do love October through December.  It is a fun and festive time and a wonderful time to spend with family and friends.  

This November I decided to enjoy a little less Bah Humbug from my husband and a little more joy about decking the halls.  Jim has been wanting those large blow up Christmas characters for our front yard for quite some time.  I teased him and fought him on the matter as I have always thought they were tacky.  This year, instead of standing my ground, I decided to throw caution to the wind and head out to Lowe's....on Black Friday, no less.....and buy some of these blow up characters.  I bought an 8 foot snowman and a 4 foot penguin.  Jim was delighted with this surprise!  After putting them up and decorating several trees and bushes with lights, he decided he needed yet another blow up character.  So, he went to the store and bought a 4 foot snowman to go with the large snowman and little penguin friend.  I have to admit, these guys are growing on me!  They kind of make me smile now when I see them.  Our cul-de-sac yard is a perfect place for them as they stand proudly under our large palm tree.  The greatest thing about them is the pleasure they are bringing to Jim.  He is like a kid at Christmas again and I love it!

This November we also booked plane tickets for Joseph and Ashley to fly down here for Christmas, and Madeline and I hung our stockings on our doors in anticipation of a surprise each day from December 1st through the 25th.  This is a tradition we started many years ago.  It is a way for Madeline and I to prolong the season and the gift-giving and surprises.  We both love Christmas so much.  In fact, today we each found our first surprise in our stocking!  I can't wait to see the next 24.  

Last year I started a new tradition for Porter.  Martha liked our stocking idea and kept saying she should do that with Porter.  I don't think they ever got around to it, but I knew it would be something he would enjoy.  Last year I mailed a big box to him with 26 (there was a special surprise for the day AFTER Christmas) little gifts in it.  They were individually wrapped and numbered and he had to open one per day in order.  He reported to me via Facebook what gift he opened that day.  December 1st was an advent calendar so he could begin the countdown to Christmas!  Porter hasn't reported his gift to me today.  I am waiting to hear about it.  I decided to send the box of 25 gifts to him again this year.  Some things we never outgrow!

November's extra activities didn't stop to make way for the usual chores, errands, cooking, cleaning, bowling league, poker group, more bridge, and all the things that just go into any month.  It just made for a jam-packed month.  But that is okay with me.  I like to shake things up from time to time and holiday time 

busy-ness and work is still enjoyable for me.  I can tell that I am getting older as I am not as worried about everything being perfect.  I think that is a good thing.  It allows me to enjoy it a little bit more.  I always think of some of the wonderful words of wisdom that Erma Bombeck spoke about at times like these.  I do plan to worry less and enjoy more.

As time marches on, we continue to pass the torch from person to person, generation to generation.  Some traditions remain and some change. Some new ideas are introduced and are good enough to last and some turn out to have not been the best of ideas.  However, the thing that remains constant throughout this passing of time is the love and the bond of family.   

And memories are made of this.

(Speaking of the late, great Erma Bombeck, here is one of her more humorous statements):

"Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare.  They are consumed in twelve minutes.  Half-times take twelve minutes.  This is not coincidence."

~~Erma Bombeck

Memories

This blog has been about the things in Mom's house.  There are countless other things that have yet to be written about.  I look forward to future blogs about all the things that are a part of my life and Mom's life and all that have touched our lives.  It never ceases to amaze me how looking at a painting or playing on an out of tune piano can conjure up so many memories.

Which leads me to this blog.  I was drying my hair this morning and thinking about my Mom, as I do every morning before I call her around 9:00 a.m. to check in with her for the day.  I was thinking about how amazing she is and what a full life she has lived.  She tells me all the time that she knows how blessed and lucky she has been her entire life.  I know this isn't just lip service...I know she means it.  I know that her life has  been blessed and that she feels fulfilled.  That is an awesome and amazing feeling.  I know our family has always talked about not living with regrets.  That is what the power of forgiveness does for us.  I cannot stress enough the concept of not having regrets.  If all things can be resolved, or at least simply forgiven, regrets are unnecessary.  When there are no regrets, there can always be peace.

But anyway, I thought about Mom and her blessed life and I thought about all the people who have come into her life to make it so blessed.  I started thinking that this blog doesn't just simply need to be about the things in her house that relate to her and her life, but it can be about the memories that have been created inside her house and because of who she is.  This opens up a whole new avenue and gives new life to this blog.
I love writing this and I know Mom loves reading it.  She keeps telling me I am writing our family's history.  I didn't set out to do that, but I guess the telling of the stories that have come from her home and her things have sort of done just that.
I have always been commended for my good memory.  I guess it is a gift that God gave me because I am so sentimental.  I love having memories and I love knowing I am who I am because of where I come from.  I guess that desire and that knowledge leads me to my good memory. 
However, God doesn't necessarily grant me good memory for life, and I suppose it gives me license to write about my life and memories....at least there will always be some sort of record of the life and times of my family!

I have always said that Mom's things are not merely things, rather they are reminders of all the people and events that have come to pass to create a history for us.  I would much rather hold in my hand a handmade ashtray made by Martha at summer camp for her Daddy that evokes a couple of interesting stories and shows a lovely sentiment than to hold a piece of silver that really never was used by my family or has any significant stories behind it.
I truly am a sentimental slob!

I am excited to continue my blog through time.  I look forward to touching on so many more memories and to remember the people who have come in and out of our lives. 
If I plan to write the history for Mom (and me), I need to get busy remembering the people and activities that have touched our lives.  So many of the things in Mom's house have evoked those memories, but there are so many more that exist just because.  And they happened in her house and because of her.  That is reason enough for me.
I long to recall them and I long to write about them.

And memories are made of this.

Jackets in July

Mom always says she hates hot weather.  It was always a joke when she mentioned moving to Florida.  No one could imagine her living in such a warm climate. 
It gets hot in North Carolina, but the truth of the matter is, Florida is just hot longer and more intensely...with the exception of the middle of summer.  It gets much hotter and muggier  (and more mosquitoes) in North Carolina than in Florida at that time.  Clearwater has never seen 100 degrees, but many times in North Carolina I remember the mercury rising to that point.
But none of that matters unless you are outside in it!  Being inside in a cozy home with air conditioning and good insulation, no one realizes how hot it is outside...how the pavement burns your feet and how you can be completely wilted after just one quick errand.
I guess I might be weird, but I love it.  I will never complain about the heat, but I will complain profusely about the cold.  As my sweet husband says, "cold hurts."  And it does.  It is painful and uncomfortable and lugging around coats, sweaters, hats and gloves is not fun.  Period.
I guess it is clear I am where I need and want to be!

But back to Mom.  Mom hated getting out in the really hot weather, but I know she also hated getting out in the snow and cold rain.  Anyone would...particularly at age 87.  Yes, the snow is lovely while watching it fall as you sit inside your home with the heat on and the gas logs in the fireplace roaring!
Mom used to get out and walk the neighborhood every day.  She and Daddy were doing this when I was in high school living on Ridgeview Drive.  They just knew how to time their walks so that they never had to be out in extreme weather.  I also know the Mall became a place for walkers when the weather didn't cooperate.  I know that the walking is how Mom stayed so fit and healthy and was able to eat massive amounts of Snickers bars!
I am trying to emulate her (minus the Snickers bars) as I want to be healthy and have the longevity that she has and that her sister, Jessie, had.

Granted, walking in the heat isn't easy.  You either have to go early or late...or join a gym and walk on the treadmill!  I, too, have learned how to time my walks to avoid extreme heat and I know which days I will just go to the gym instead.
Mom doesn't really do these walks any more.  I know in her mind she'd like to, but her body is tired and she is unable.  She had a knee replacement at age 85 and recovered nicely, which is amazing.  She never wanted to do her post-op therapy sessions and exercises, but she was very determined to walk around as much as possible.  But ever since this surgery, she has really limited her walks.  I know it hurts and I also know she doesn't want to strain what we call her 'good knee.'

Her decision to move to Florida was a surprise to us all.  I am so thankful that she did it.  I love having her nearby.  I know she misses a lot of things about Shelby, but she truly seems content in her little world at Stratford Court.  I believe it is a good fit for her.
She walks up and down the halls of her building for her exercise.  Therefore, it doesn't matter what temperature it is outside!   It all works perfectly for her.  She really doesn't care that much about being outside.  Maybe now that the weather is cooling down, she will enjoy sitting out on her screened in porch.  It is nice and comfortable when the weather cooperates.
I can go to the beach and walk and look for seashells and she can simply stay within the confines of her building and we are both happy campers!
Life is good in Florida.

I have already blogged about Mom's closet full of white blouses.  My mom is a beautiful lady and a classy dresser.  I am not as much like her in that regard as I would like to be.  I guess I have been down here too long and have adopted the 'Florida lifestyle.'  I was much more fashionable in North Carolina!
When Mom and I went back to Shelby last week, the only thing she quickly snatched up to bring back down to Florida with her were some white turtlenecks.  She has drawers full of these just like she has the closet full of white blouses.  She wears the white turtlenecks under her jackets when the weather is cooler.

Mom is still able to wear these jackets down here because she doesn't go outside much.  They are really very appropriate, as it is chilly inside the building at Stratford Court.  Wearing a jacket down to dinner is not only fashionable and acceptable, it is necessary.  Jackets in July are just as fitting as jackets in January.  Mom always gets comments on her jackets.  She does have so many beautiful ones.  I know because I recently saw them all in a 'fashion show.'
Madeline, Jim and I went over to visit Mom after church one Sunday.  Madeline isn't one for sitting still, so for some unknown reason, she opened Mom's closet and pulled out a jacket and put it on.  It looked great on her and Mom was tickled to see how well it fit Madeline and how cute it was on her.  Of course, that just turned a little spark into a flame and Madeline proceeded to model 20 or more of Mom's jackets.  We all oohed and ahhed and we had trouble deciding which one was our favorite!  Of course, Madeline hammed it up and made us laugh as we admired the clothes.
I think it was one of Mom's most enjoyable afternoons at Stratford Court.  Leave it to Madeline to simply entertain us!  She has a gift for doing that.  Of course, it doesn't take much as we are all easily amused, but sometimes you just need a little bit of Madeline in your life.

Jessie had a lot of  nice jackets too.  Hers were a bit more casual and a bit more conservative than Mom's, but Mom has some of Jessie's jackets in her closet now and she wears them from time to time.  Some of them were included in the fashion show Madeline put on for us.  It was easy to guess which ones were Jessie's and which ones were Mom's.  Mom had a lot of colorful and unique jackets, to put it mildly.

I think I am the only one in the family who didn't wear a lot of jackets.  Martha loved them too and had so many beautiful ones.  We always knew her style and might see a jacket in a store and immediately say "that looks like Martha!"
I wore jackets when I lived in North Carolina, but not nearly to the extent that my mom, aunt and sister did.  Madeline seems to have inherited that jacket gene.  She loves them.  I think it's funny that Madeline will be able to go over to her 87 year old grandmother's home and borrow her clothes when she wants to go out for a night on the town.  There were several of the jackets that I'm sure Madeline will definitely wear some day.  She really liked them.  I would love to hear the reaction of some of her friends when they compliment her outfit and she says, "it's my grandmother's!"  Who said grandma's attic has to be filled with aprons, housedresses and matronly clothes?

And memories are made of this.




Porter, Mom and Madeline at Rittenhouse Square in Philadelphia



Mom's Birthday Celebration in Shelby

Two Peas in a Pod
Madeline and Mom (clad in jackets)

Jessie, Madeline and Jimmy

Eric and Mom
playing games at Thanksgiving

Heritage United Methodist Church Tea
Pat, Mom, Me, Valerie and Trina

Turn About is Fair Play

I have spent months writing about the things in Mom's house....so many of which are now in my house.  Well, I got to thinking about all the things that WERE in my house that ended up in Mom's house.  As they say, turn about is fair play!

When Jim and I bought our house on Hillside Drive in Shelby, there was a chandelier...in the bedroom!  It wasn't our taste, particularly in the bedroom.  Had it been in the dining room, we may have felt differently.  Anyway, we chose to take it down and replace it with something a little less ornate (actually a LOT less ornate!)  I will admit, it is a beautiful and intricate chandelier, it just wasn't working for us at the time.

Mom couldn't believe we didn't want the chandelier, so she took it.  I don't really know where she planned to put it, but she couldn't let it go!  I don't really blame her, understanding her love for such lovely and unique things. 

I remember when we sold our house on Ridgeview Drive, there was a beautiful chandelier over the dining room table.  It was one of those to-die-for chandeliers.  When the new owners invited Mom to come over and see the house, she was sick to notice that chandelier was gone!  I guess not everyone has the taste for such fancy and beautiful crystal chandeliers.  This memory is probably why Mom wanted to take the chandelier that Jim and I didn't want.  It's hard to let go of beautiful things.

Well, long story short, that chandelier from our Hillside Drive house is now in my garage here in Florida 24 years later!  It was never hung anywhere, and the crystals are all loose and in need of repair.  However, I am trying to figure out a way to get this chandelier hung in my dining room. It will take some drilling, rewiring, and ceiling repair, but I think it will be worth it.  I have been wanting one in there,  and after packing up Mom's house and moving so much of her stuff down here....that chandelier included....I have about decided that it is time to hang it.  It will hold a lot of sentimental value.....not to mention it will be a beautiful addition to my home.

The chandelier Mom left behind in the dining room of her house on Lynhurst Lane puts this chandelier to shame.  It is absolutely gorgeous, and if I could imagine it in my house in any way shape or form, I would move it here.  It is just much too large and formal for my house, but it is truly a masterpiece.  I guess whoever buys Mom's house will luck into that one.

I have already blogged about the lovely clock that was Jessie's that is now mine.  I proudly display this pink and white ceramic clock in my living room.  It doesn't match nor does the style of it go with my decor, but guess what?  I really don't care.  That clock brings so many things to me each time I look at it.  It is truly now one of the most cherished pieces in my home.

It was Jessie's and I can picture it on a side table in her living room.  When she gave it to me, I was stressed out about moving it to Florida....not to mention it didn't go with my decor.  When I realized how beautiful it looked in Mom's living room, I told her to "babysit" it for a while.  And she did for several years.  But now Mom is in Florida and that clock came down with her.  She doesn't have a place for it at Stratford Court, and it is mine, so I decided to find a place for it...right or wrong.  Needless to say, it has become a conversation piece and I smile each time I look at it.  Who cares that it doesn't match?  It was Jessie's and now it's mine!

On a totally different note, the Barbies that were Martha's and mine are now in my garage with Madeline's name on them.  I know Eric will be overjoyed to have a couple of boxes full of old Barbies and their clothes moved into their home once they are married! 

I have always loved dolls.  I got them and loved them and took care of them.  Yes.  Martha had a Barbie the first year they were ever made!  She was definitely "hip" that way!  Martha learned many years later that the Barbies from the original run were quite valuable.  The way you could tell was to see a hole in the bottom of the left foot of the Barbie.  Martha called me and asked me to check her Barbies for left foot holes.  I did.  They were not from the original run, but they were from the first year that Barbie was made.  I think that is pretty cool!

Martha outgrew the dolls she really was never into in the first place.  I was one of those dorky kids that saved all my allowance (except for the 50 cents per week I pledged to the church) so I almost always had some money stashed away.  Martha, on the other hand, was more of a spender.  I don't think she was wrong in her spending.  I just think Martha had a flair for living, and living she did!  I am happy that her shortened life was blessed with an abundance of experiences.

Anyway, Martha gladly "sold" me her Barbies and the Barbie accessories.  I paid her my allowance in order to be the proud owner of all the Barbies and their lovely clothes!  Madeline inherited my love and passion for these dolls, and I will never forget that at age 22 she called me when I was in Shelby packing up Mom's house to move to Florida to tell me not to forget HER Barbies!

So, Eric,  Madeline AND her Barbies are yours now.

Jim and I bought our dream home on Fairway Drive in Shelby.  I don't think either of us will ever get over missing that house.  It was the perfect house for us in so many ways.  It was on the golf course.  I used to tease Jim because he had a little office (which we wallpapered in a golf theme) that had a window that overlooked the golf course.  I worried that he'd never get any work done for staring out at the golf course, but instead, it just made him happy and motivated, so he did do his work and he did it well!

I loved the huge country kitchen.  That kitchen and the front porch with rocking chairs that overlooked the rollling hills of the golf course were enough to make me feel like I was in heaven.  Being a beach person, that says a lot.  That is how beautiful our lot was.  I was content to rock on that front porch rather than sit at the beach.

When we moved into the house, there was a lovely carved screen that separated the breakfast room from the kitchen.  I liked it, but I was more interested in an open area that fulfilled my love of cooking with being a mother of three.  I needed to be able to see what was going on at all times, and I just love open and bright spaces.

This screen was too pretty to get rid of so Mom took it and put it upstairs in her little office room.  It is still in the corner and I love it.  It is interesting how a piece can look different and feel different depending on the area where you put it.  I love the passing back and forth of the pieces.  As I have said....turn about is fair play.

I don't know where this piece will end up, but I am sure it will stay in the family somehow.

And speaking of Mom's upstairs, I still laugh when I go in the bathroom up there!  It is papered with the wallpaper I ordered for my dining room in our house in Raleigh.  I still love the wallpaper, and surprisingly, it looks great in this bathroom although it was purchased for a dining room!  I couldn't return the paper and Mom was just finishing this bathroom so she offered to take it.  I couldn't use the wallpaper because it was more orangey than maroon, but the paper itself is lovely.  30 some years later, this paper looks awesome in Mom's bath!  Go figure.

When I lived on Hillside Drive, I had these two prints hanging on the wall in my dining room.  They were inexpensive simply framed prints, but they matched and looked great with my decor.  They were prints of vases and flowers.  They had a bit of a southwestern flair, which doesn't usually appeal to me (or Mom).   When we moved, Mom said she wanted them for her upstairs office room.....the same room where she put the carved screen!  I think this upstairs room was quickly becoming a room furnished with my things rather than hers.  Turn about is fair play.

There are so many other things that have passed back and forth.  One is a pencil drawing done by Roger Holland.  He was a dear friend of mine in high school and we took art classes together.  No matter how artistic I thought I might be, I recognized that Roger was truly the epitome of the artist that I wanted to be.  He had a raw talent and I am sure that is why he is now the successful architect that he is. 

I think we had an assignment in art class and Roger's result was a pencil drawing of his bedroom at home.  It was an amazing drawing and very neat and detailed.  He depicted his room with skis, balls, art supplies and other things cluttering the room.  It definitely looked like the room of a teenage boy.  I loved the drawing and was so impressed by the talent of this sweet guy.

The drawing was matted and I think it was entered into one of the art shows at SHS.  I don't know if it won any ribbons or not (it should have), but all I remember was that Roger gave it to me.  He told me it was the first piece of art he had ever given away.  Trust me, I held it near and dear to my heart, because I am a humble artist myself and I know the impact of giving away a little piece of yourself.

Long story short....this piece is "missing."  I know it is at my Mom's house as I have looked at it from time to time.  Somehow we can't find it.  I guess this (and one other thing we can't find) will remain a huge mystery until it can be found.

I remember that this piece went with me to Elon for my dorm room and it came back to Shelby when I came back.  I saw it and enjoyed it many times.  I know it is in that house somewhere.   I can't wait to uncover it.  This drawing is awesome and meaningful and I can't bear the thought of it being lost.  I feel proud to be the recipient of this wonderful piece of artwork.

There were so many things in Mom's house that were earmarked for me.  I appreciate that she noticed what I wanted/needed.  I am such a sentimental sap.  I wish I didn't have such emotional ties to so many things!  There isn't the space for all the things I cherish.  Fortunately, I am willing to rearrange my house a bit, and I have three children who might like to have some of these things to remember their Grandmother by.

It is probably a good thing that Porter already took the Swarovski crystal figures and put them in his room.  He wanted them and I am delighted that he has them.  I just want him to know that I was with Mom when she bought them.  It was a hoot and one of the more memorable moments in my life!  My enjoyment of these pieces is more in the story behind them than the pieces themselves.  I am sure Porter will let me come over and enjoy them whenever I want!  His Mom loved them and I think they probably remind him of his mom as much as they do of my mom.  And that's a beautiful thing.

Mom bought the Swarovski crystal pieces in NYC.  I love NY.  I wouldn't want to live there, but there is no more "happening" place in the world.  I dream of seeing a Broadway show daily!  It is my passion aand has been since my Daddy introduced me to the Broadway theater when I was 12 or 13.  But that is a whole other story.....

Anyway, Carol Rose was/is a dear friend of mine and I knew that her mother-in-law and my mom were friends.  I so wanted to go on a trip with my Mom.  We need to work on making memories.

Patsy and Carol were on board, so I talked it over with Mom and we all went to NYC!  It was 1991 or sometime around then.

Carol and I still laugh about feeling like Lucy and Ethel when we went into the store where Mom bought these large Swarovski figurines. 

Even a back room and a promise of a class of wine or a special drink didn't prepare Carol or me from what transpired!   We both agreed that we definitely represented Lucy and Ethel.  I will never forget the moment...loved being with my dear friend and my mom .  But the whole experience seemed so surrreal.  I am just glad that everyone enjoyed just hanging out and relishing the moment even though it felt like the filming of an "I Love Lucy" episode.  We sat in the back room of this antique shop and 2 guys with their gold chains and silky shirts were so enamored by these 4 southern ladies.  I think they had us "hooked," and I guess they did, because Mom did buy all the crystal and I think the rest of us each bought something.  They were bringing Persian rugs with price tags that left Carol and I speechless and rolling them out for us to admire.  They were fast talkers and had plenty of stuff to show us!

I guess you had to be there to truly appreciate the sight, but I know I will never forget what Mom went through to get those Swarovski figures.  I know Porter will appreciate them, and I know that had he been able to experience the shopping experience with us first hand, he'd get a kick out of it!  But Porter always appreciates a good story, so this will be one 'for the books!'

I painted a picture when I was in high school (probably in one of the classes I shared with Roger Holland) of some blue denim high top sneakers with little children crawling on them.  It is a weird painting, but I sort of like it.  The shoes were actually shoes I wore (I guess in my less "preppie" stage) and the children crawling on the shoes are inspired by old photographs of Martha and me.  I had it in my room on Ridgeview Drive and after I went off to college, Mom wanted to have the painting.  At this point I didn't care much for it and I certainly didn't want to haul it to Elon with me, so we had it framed and it hung for years and years in Mom's upstairs on Lynhurst Lane.

When Mom moved down here to Florida, Madeline said she loved the whole upstairs bedroom of Mom's house on Lynhurst Lane, and if she could choose anything from the house (in addition to the Barbie dolls), she would choose that bedroom.  No one else seemed interested in it at all, so that whole bedroom is now in my garage awaiting Madeline to get married and move it into her own home.  I couldn't help but bring back the "shoe painting," but I really couldn't find anywhere to hang it.  I put it out in the garage with Madeline's stuff and who knows, she may just want an old painting that her mom painted in high school hanging in her house!

Mom's bookshelves on Lynhurst Lane are filled with books.  She has a lot of bookshelves and to get that many books to fill them definitely took a bit of collaborating!  I still peruse the shelves whenever I go in there.  I know many of the books are mine and some are Martha's.  I think there are books from my cousin, Tony Hammock on that shelf.  I don't really have room in my house for more books, but if I did I would bring back all my old books, and perhaps some of the books that aren't mine.  I love books and always have.  I think most people in our family feel the same way.  These books have experienced the 'turn about is fair play' many times over!

I painted a little footstool when the boys were little.  It has painted on it Jimmy and Joe along with a smiley face.  It is at Mom's house upstairs in the guest room.  I don't exactly know how or why she ended up with my stool, but it is there.  Along with that stool is a wooden swivel chair.  It is the chair I used as a desk chair in my kitchen on Fairway Drive.  Again, I don't exactly know how it ended up at Mom's, but it did!  Turn about is fair play.

There is a little porcelain bunny that was mine.  I won it as a bridge prize one time.  I love the little bunny, but when I realized Mom's rabbit collection was growing and I knew she had admired my little bunny, I decided to give it to her one Christmas.  She enjoyed it with her collection for years.  When we were packing her stuff to move, she gave a rabbit from her collection to several different people.  A lot of people said they wanted one of the rabbits to remember her by.  They associate the rabbits with Mom because of her big collection.  Anyway, I wasn't about to give away this little porcelain bunny, so I took it  back!  I am not really an Indian-giver, but I thought I might as well let that be the rabbit I took from Mom's as a rememberance.  It sits on a table in my extra bedroom/computer room/craft room.  The little bunny always makes me smile.

Sometimes it is hard to tell what's what and who an item belongs to.  I think it is interesting how we have managed to pass things back and forth between homes.  Sometimes they come back to the original place just like a boomerang.  Sometimes they stay put.

I guess that old saying "What's mine is yours and what's yours is mine" really rings true in our family!

It doesn't really matter who bought the item or whose house it was in or is in now, it is really in the sharing and the sheer enjoyment of these things.  It is important that the right thing end up with the right person at the right time.

And memories are made of this.

From My Dining Room to Mom's Upstairs Office Room

From My Room to Mom's Upstairs Bedroom

From My Dining Room to Mom's Upstairs Bathroom

From My Kitchen to Mom's Upstairs Office Room

Chandelier in Mom's house on Lynhurst Lane

From Mom's Foyer to Porter's Bedroom
(Wise Ole Owl)