Just today my friend, Liz, posted 3 things she was grateful for on Facebook. She challenged me to do the same. It is a challenge that has been going around to make people think more on their blessings than their woes. It is a wonderful exercise and I have been blessed by reading what my friends are grateful for. Today Liz mentioned that she was grateful that she was able to 'go home again' and live in her hometown after 42 years in other places. She reason she is grateful for this is so she could spend the last years of her parents' lives with them. She mentioned that her Dad lived to age 92 and her mom to age 95. That is such a blessing. Soon after reading this, Mom called me. I asked her about her friend and if he was feeling better (he has had a cold) and she said that yes, he was, but she reminded me that he is 94 and that it is sort of scary. Then she laughed and said, "well, I'm 89. No one in our family has lived nearly that long except Jessie (her sister). She was 97."
Also today our associate pastor, John, came into my office and we chatted briefly. Upon realizing I have 3 grown children, he asked about grandchildren. I told him, no, but that I was 'wishing and hoping!' He assured me that with three grown children, it would likely happen before I know it! Another milestone to anticipate.
So in one day, I had several age-related comments that really got me thinking.
Jim talks a lot about aging. I think it is because he is nearing that magic number of 62 when you begin to think about retiring, social security and all those good things. Sometimes to hear him talk, however, he makes it sound as if 62 is OLD.
Although my body defies me sometimes with ailments and limitations, my mind and spirit are very young. I just never have stopped to think about being old. But I guess 58 is no spring chicken!
My 40th high school reunion is next month. 40th. Thinking of it that way, it does seem like my friends and I are getting old! But I always remember that my Dad was a real believer in 'you're as old as you feel!' I don't think he ever felt old....although he only lived to be 66 and I was only 31 when he passed away. At least I know that he lived his life feeling young at heart.
I actually was thinking about writing this blog about turning 50 last spring when Tim DuBois, our youth pastor at the time, turned 50. Tim is like a boy....he is fit, active and inspiring. Everyone made a big deal about his turning 50. The Lighthouse was filled with signs about being Over the Hill and people would pop in and tease him. Tim seems like one of those ageless people, and I guess knowing he had reached the big Five-Oh was reason for teasing.
Virginia, Tim's assistant and right-hand woman, thought about a birthday treat for Tim. Tim loves Krispy Kreme donuts and as a rule, Virginia got them for breakfast on his birthday. The closest Krispy Kreme closed, so Virginia had another wonderful idea. We serve breakfast to High School and Middle School students before school on Fridays at the Lighthouse. Virginia found a recipe for Birthday Cake Pancakes, so we got all the ingredients and mixed them together with instructions for our wonderful volunteer breakfast cooks. The birthday cake pancakes were a hit and everyone, including Tim, loved them.
I got to thinking, turning 50 ain't so bad......birthday cake pancakes and lots of love, attention and good wishes!
I made me think of my own 50th birthday. It was a wonderful birthday and it will always be remembered. I was telling Rachel, my co-worker, a bit about it today, as a matter of fact. Yes, this definitely was a day of mentioning ages and talking about milestones!
I play bridge with a group of amazing women. I love them like sisters and I look forward to the times when we are all together. They call me the baby of the group because everyone in the group is older than I am. We normally don't make a big to-do about birthdays in this group, but on my 50th, these ladies all chipped in and bought me a lovely slide to wear on a chain. It is a tri-colored flower slide...gold, silver and copper colored. It is lovely and I think of them every time I wear it. They said they just had to honor me now that I had FINALLY reached 50! That was 8 years ago. I'm still the baby, but I guess I'm 'catching up!' 2 of my 3 children are married. We are officially empty-nesters. We don't have grandchildren yet, but as Pastor John said, it's only a matter of time! I guess I have more 'in common' with these ladies now than I did when I first joined them. I had a first-grader and none of them had children at home....at least not nearly that young! So, that beautiful gift sort of kicked off my 50th birthday experience!
My husband outdid himself for my 50th. He really considered all things that I love and enjoy. He is really thoughtful at all times, but this was amazing!
Several years ago he had bought me a diamond tennis bracelet. I wore it every day and loved it so much. One day I had been out running errands and shopping and driving kids to and fro. Later that afternoon I realized my bracelet was gone! I retraced my steps to no avail. I then called CVS, Winn-Dixie, Jacobsen's department store and Suntrust bank and asked if my bracelet had been turned in. It had not. I gave them all my information and every day I jumped whenever the phone rang thinking it might be one of these stores saying someone found it and turned it in. I never got the bracelet back, and I know that we shouldn't put too much value in 'things,' but I consider my things much more than simple things. This bracelet represented a thoughtful and loving gesture from my husband. I was really sick about losing it, and it was certainly out of character for me. I am very organized and very careful about most everything I do.
But I digress.....
For my 50th birthday my husband really spoiled me. He bought me a new diamond tennis bracelet even more beautiful than the one I had lost! It had been several years since I lost the first bracelet. He was very proud to give it to me and had really done his research and knew about the quality and clarity of the diamonds. It touched me that he cared enough to learn about his purchase so that he could share it with me. The other beautiful thing about this gift is that he had earned a nice bonus from work and it used that to buy this gift for me! Needless to say, I definitely feel the love every time I put it on.....and I also check the clasp often as I wear it!
As if this generous gift wasn't enough, Jim took me to New York for my birthday weekend. I love to visit New York because I love theater and going to Broadway shows is definitely the ultimate entertainment for me. It is magical. I get so excited and so wrapped up in the experience that it stays with me long after the show is over. We managed to squeeze 3 shows into that weekend, but the highlight was seeing "Three Days of Rain." Ironically, it rained the whole 3 days we were in New York, so this was appropriate! "Three Days of Rain" is the only Broadway show Julia Roberts has ever been in. I love Julia Roberts. I don't know how to explain it, but she is special to me and to see her in her first Broadway show was a dream come true. And I saw her from the 8th row in the center. And I saw her preform with only 2 other actors....Bradley Cooper and Paul Rudd. Need I say more? I loved the show. The set looked and sounded like rain the entire time, and when we left the theater we were in the rain. It was like we extended the show into the city. Jim wasn't wild about the show, but he said he was happy as a clam watching me watch this magical moment on stage. He knew I was in my glory and this was all that mattered. And this took place on the very day of my 50th birthday....April 22, 2006.
The weekend ended with a wonderful dinner the following evening at The Beacon. Jim had learned about this restaurant from a customer he had at a restaurant in Tarpon Springs. There was some relationship between this customer and the chef of The Beacon. Jim made the reservation before we left Florida, and he made it simply by recommendation of this customer. He never mentioned anything about knowing the chef or a special occasion or anything when making the reservation. As the most memorable dining experience we have ever had progressed, we began to believe that perhaps that had been tipped off! It began by walking in and being seated at the best table in the place. We sat down and ordered a drink, and soon after our drinks came, a platter of oysters, the restaurant specialty appetizer, arrived with a comment from the server "compliments of the chef." I personally don't like oysters, but the gesture was touching and Jim was in his glory as he got to eat the whole platter! After that, we placed our orders. Everything was a la carte. I ordered sea scallops and Jim ordered a New York strip and we both ordered salads. The salads came and we enjoyed those, then our entrees came.....along with a family style serving of potatoes and another family style serving of asparagus.....with the same comment as before: "compliments of the chef." We ate slowly, savoring every delicious morsel and getting so stuffed! We wanted to be able to eat it all and so we took our time. We realized that we were there for almost 3 hours! When we left, the rained had stopped and we were happy to be able to walk back to Times Square, enjoy the sights and walk off some of the food. But the food didn't end with the entrees and vegetables......after explaining to my husband that those were the best sea scallops I had EVER had and that everything was so beautifully presented and so delicious, here comes two servers with a gigantic platter filled with bite sized pastries and chocolates and chocolate covered strawberries.....above all these goodies around the rim of the platter was "Happy 50th Birthday, Mary" written in chocolate.
So, I can truthfully say, turning 50 ain't so bad!
I think about Madeline and Eric who have been married less than a year and Joseph and Ashley who are about to have their 2nd anniversary....they are all just embarking on this ride called marriage. They have so many wonderful milestones to look forward to. Jim and I enjoy sitting back and watching them and remembering our own married beginning 38 years ago. People say times flies, and sometimes it feels like it does. But often I look across at my gray haired handsome husband and I smile with contentment. I do remember the days when I looked across at him and his hair was dark brown and he was more restless than he is these days. It seems like a long time ago, and for that I am grateful. I can fill in all those years with so many memories....raising 3 children, working, buying homes and fixing them up,birthday parties, sporting events, weddings and funerals, vacations, ups and downs and worries, spiritual growth, contentment, and anticipation. As of lately, Jim and I agree that our favorite time is the late afternoon just before sunset when we sit out on the lanai, prop our feet up, look around at our pool and our yard. I love the sound and the sight of the sprinklers slowly arching back and forth across the green grass. Jim knows this and he turns on the sprinkler system and has it set in the back part of the yard that I look at as I anticipate the coming sunset. It is so peaceful out there. And we talk. Really talk. We sometimes have serious discussions and sometimes we reminisce. Sometimes we talk about the things we plan to do "someday" and sometimes we discuss problems and situations that we know we have to face. I just know I am blessed to have this gray-haired man by my side and I do believe we have a lot of life left to live together. My Dad's favorite quote to my mom always was: "come grow old along with me....the best is yet to be." It is definitely the attitude to have. It allows you to enjoy the moments rather than worry about them or stress that you are aging and that your knees hurt and you can't do yard work for as many hours in a row as you used to. It gives you that sense of pleasant anticipation of more moments to enjoy.....perhaps better moments than you have experienced to date.
But thinking about life and times, milestones and memories, you never know how much or how little time you have on this earth. Therefore, it is important to make every moment count. They don't just have to be those big moments....like a trip to New York.....they can be the moments when you just sit and talk or sit next to someone special in silence. Sometimes the best things can be realized in the silence. It truly can be golden. I think from now on I am going to revel in my birthdays. I am going to realize that they are a big deal......And not just milestone birthdays like the 50th, but every birthday.
Whether you are remembering or anticipating moments or milestones.....remember that memories are made of this.
Then.....and now.
They grow up.
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| And the sun sets on another day. |
